why am i alive?

And I don’t mean this in a “oh fuck im going to kill myself because my life is pointless” kind of way. I’m just like shit man, Im an escort, and business has been slow, and that makes me question myself. obviously. fuck. only an escort would undertstand.

and i got these amazing nails done, and i cant type worth a shit with them which is driving me nuts. maybe something to do with the depression i’ve been having for the past while. fuck these nails. but damn their hot. story of my life. my bipolar life.

SPLIT. thats the only way to sum up my brain, and my thinking, and my actions, my everyything. schizophrenia literally means split-brain.

Finally the agency hired another girl. fuck its nice to have someone to relate to in real life. Even if its just for a day, who knows how long she will last.

Im so anti—social. Its my goal this year to open myself up to the idea of meeting people and making friends, relationships. Im so closed, so unavailable. And to travel is my second goal. Im gonna go travel across to the other side of the world for awhile 🙂 Thailand will be my first stop, then who knows, maybe australia, or Rome. find me some love, and some surfing.

I apologize for the long gap in my updates ❤

love you lovers Xoxoxo